The Most Random Fanfic Ever
by Himizu-chan
Summary: This fic is completly random and Mountain Dew induced. The four guys are walking around Las Vegas where things are a little out of the ordinary today... and having an evil doctor and mad scientist stalking you doesn't help matters. Complete!
1. Default Chapter

Himizu-chan: Well, I'm not sure how this will work, but I'm stuck on BSTV's and I'm finished with The Beginning, I'm so hyper it's not even funny, and I'm bored out of my mind. So, this is a trial run of something random that I wrote. Hope you like it.

**The Most Random Fanfic Ever**

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. I also don't own any mind-control devices, but my friends and I are working on that one. Some of our top scientists from The House of the Nutcases are currently developing some and as soon as they're finished, we authors will take over the world! Mwa ha ha ha ha! Ahem. I do own this story and whatever plot happens to come out of it, and I own just about everything in this story… Oh yes, and I own the Cosmic Sheep… in a way… they're trying to kill me. Does that count?

**Description and Rating**: Since the author is high on Mountain Dew, this will seem highly random, but it will basically involve the YYH boys running from an evil doctor and a mad scientist who are trying to control their minds and drive them insane. Rated PG for language and utter randomness.

**Credits**: Written by Himizu. No one else wants any credit because this is so random.

**Setting**: Some random street in some random city. I don't care where they are. They're in Las Vegas, because that's where C.S.I. is.

(The four boys are walking down a random street, window-shopping)

Yusuke: This is so boring. Why are we window-shopping?"

Kurama: Because Himizu has threatened to blow us up with her atomic bombs unless we do.

Yusuke: (Twitch) That's a good reason.

Hiei: Hn.

Kuwabara: Look! Kittens! (Face pressed against a pet-shop window)

Hiei: Kittens are boring. (Blows up shop)

Kuwabara: NOOOOO! The poor kittens! T.T

(All the kittens land on Kuwabara's head)

Kuwabara: Kittens! (Passes out) x.x

Yusuke, Kurama, Hiei: … -.-;

* * *

(In some random freaky lab thingie…)

Evil Doctor (ED): (Watching the four boys from some weird camera that's following them) Ah ha! The perfect subjects! What do you think?

Mad Scientist (MS): (Taps fingers together and raises alternate eyebrows in a really weird way) Excellent… IGOR!

Igor: Yes Master?

MS: Send out the Little Old Ladies!

Igor: The Little Old Ladies, Master?

MS: Yes, the Little Old Ladies!

Igor: The Little Old Ladies?

MS: YES, THE LITTLE OLD LADIES! NOW!

Igor: Yes Master… (Runs off)

* * *

(The guys are still walking down the street)

Kuwabara: (Now awake) Where did the kittens go?

Yusuke: Who cares?

Hiei: Does anybody want ice cream?

Kurama: Sure.

(All go into an ice cream store)

Ice Cream Dude: Hello. What would you like today?

Yusuke: Chocolate.

Kurama: Vanilla.

Kuwabara: Strawberry.

Hiei: Everything.

Ice Cream Dude: Okay, that'll be $84.61… plus tax!

Hiei: (Pulls out katana) Are you sure?

Ice Cream Dude: … As a matter of fact, we're having a special today… all ice cream is free… please don't hurt me.

Hiei: Much better. (Eats ice cream)

(Everyone else eats ice cream)

Everyone: Yummy…

(They all go outside)

Yusuke: Hey, look at that! It's the world's only shop dedicated to foxes.

Kurama: Foxes! (Runs into shop)

Everyone else: … -.-;;;

(Two hours later)

(Kurama walks out of the store with a giant pile of shopping bags, filled with everything in the store)

Kurama: I can't believe. They ran out of foxes. No more foxes. T.T

Yusuke, Kuwabara, Hiei: … (Face-fault)

* * *

ED: Yes, they are the perfect subjects. They are very powerful despite their ordinary and foolish appearance, yet idiotic enough that no one will notice them.

MS: (Tapping fingers and wiggling eyebrows… still…) Yes, this is most excellent. At last I will be able to get what I have wanted for so long…

ED: And that is…?

MS: Control of the Comic Sheep!

ED and Igor: -.-() (Face-fault)

Igor: Who are the Cosmic Sheep?

MS: They are neon green alien sheep who are very powerful with many nuclear weapons and other such items. And they're so cute! (Hugs a Cosmic Sheep plushie)

ED and Igor: … (Anime fall)

(The guys are still walking down the street)

(A bunch of terrified Girl Scouts comes running down the streets screaming their lungs out)

Girl Scouts: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! THEY'RE GONNA KILL US ALL! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Four Guys: -.-? … -.-()

(The Girls Scouts run up to the boys and hand them boxes of cookies)

Girl Scouts: HERE! TAKE THEM! THEY'RE FREE! WE'RE NOT COMING BACK! WE NEED TO GO… EARN MERIT BADGES! HAVE A NICE DAY!

(Girl Scouts run away)

Four Guys: -.-?Meow?

Yusuke: Cool! Free cookies!

Kuwabara: Yum!

(Yusuke and Kuwabara eat some cookies)

(A mob of little old ladies wearing dresses and funny hats and carrying canes or umbrellas or purses comes running around the corner)

Little Old Ladies: COME BACK YOU WRETCHED GIRL SCOUTS AND GIVE US YOUR COOKIES OR WE'LL MAKE YOU SIT IN OUR HOUSES DRINKING TEA WHILE WE TALK ABOUT THE GOOD OLD DAYS!

(They see the boys eating the cookies)

Little Old Ladies: COOKIES! YYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! GET THEM!

(Little old ladies rush towards the four boys)

Kurama: Now I've seen everything. Schizophrenic little old ladies.

Yusuke: How dangerous can they be?

(Little old ladies begin to beat them with canes, purses, and umbrellas) (A/N: Thank you Monty Python! Don't own)

Four Guys: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

(The four boys climb a tree)

(The old ladies try to climb the tree, but they can't, so they start throwing stuff at the four boys)

Hiei: Give them the goddamn cookies!

Kuwabara: NEVER! (Is hit on the head with a brick)

Yusuke: … (Holds up cookies so the little old ladies can see them) Fetch! (Throws cookies)

Little Old Ladies: Cookies! (Chase cookies) No more baking cookies for our wretched snot-nosed grandchildren! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Kurama: That was slightly disturbing.

Yusuke: Leave it to Himizu to put us in a messed-up place like this. (Is randomly hit on the head with a rock) Ow!

* * *

ED: Those little old ladies are some of the most deadly weapons in the universe. Soon those four boys will be at our mercy!

(ED and MS laugh insanely)

Igor: I should have gone to work for Doctor Frankenstein.

* * *

A/N: Good? Bad? Downright ugly? Let me know what you think. I love reviews! Should I keep writing, or write this off as being horrible? In the meantime, I'll keep working on my other fic. Thanks for being paitient with me. 


	2. Fangirl Attack and Kangaroos

Himizu-chan: Well, I must admit, I'm slightly surprised by the favorable responses. Not that I want you to stop sending reviews, but wow. This was something I threw together while I was high so I didn't screw up my other fics...believe me, it's scary the things I can do.

Hiei: No surprises there.

Himizu-chan: -.-# I don't remember asking your opinion, baka.

wonderingprophet: I resent that, I really do. Not everything I write is disturbing. (Looks outraged, is hit by a lighting bolt) -.-# And I never stole a Cosmic Sheep plushie, it was MS! Why would I steal plushies from sheep that want to kill me when I already stole their nukes, I mean... Cookie?

AmnarRanma: Um... no, I never have seen "Young Frankenstein". Oh well. And actually, some of this was a dream... the rest came while I was awake. Actaully, only the Girl Scout scene and the petshop scene from last chapter were dreams. Everything else so far has been while I've been awake.

BritishMindslave: It's supposed to be the most random fanfic ever... I gotta live up to my title... as for your twin, what does she write about then? what else is there to write about besides yu yu hakusho? Although burning her might be a bit harsh... just a thought. (Shrug) Sibling warfare is not my problem unless my brother tries to steal the computer.

Well, that's all I really gotta say, except, enjoy this chapter and REVIEW! Please.

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH. I own ED, MS, Igor, and that's about it.

* * *

(With the Little Old Ladies still chasing the cookies, the boys thought it was safe to climb down from the tree)

Yusuke: Now what should we do?

(Everyone else shrugs)

Random Fangirl: Hey, look, it's Kurama and Hiei!

Random Fangirls: YAY!

Kurama and Hiei: -.- Damnit… Run away

Random Fangirls: AFTER THEM! BISHIES!

Kenshin: What's going on? Why are you two running?

Kurama: … That's it! (Puts on a Kenshin costume and forces Kenshin into a Kurama costume)

Kenshin: Oro!

Random Fangirls: Look! Kenshin's with them! GET THEM ALL!

Kurama: They like you too?

Kenshin: I don't know, that I don't. It certainly appears so, that it does.

Kurama: Why are you talking like that?

Kenshin: I do not know, that I don't. That's the way I've always talked, that it is.

Hiei: Oh for crying out loud…

Sanosuke: Oh, there you are, Kenshin. Somebody just kidnapped Karou… again… She wants you to rescue her. Yahiko drank some of my sake and is passed out, so he got kidnapped too. But first, I want you to help me gamble. And I don't want you telling me all the wrong answers like you were in the anime. I want the same ingenuity you showed in the manga. Now let's go! There's money to win!

Kenshin: (Takes off Kurama costume) We should rescue Miss Karou first, that we should.

Sanosuke: Fine. It should be a good fight.

Random Fangirls: OH MY GOD! SANOSUKE! GET THEM!

Bishies: O.O

Voice in the Sky (AKA, Himizu-chan): Ok, I can stand picking on Kurama and Hiei. I can tolerate chasing Kenshin. But Sanosuke is mine! And don't even get me started on Mitari! Now leave them alone! (Uses author powers to make Random Fangirls disappear) As for you two, Kenshin and Sanosuke… Get back to you own goddamn anime!

Kenshin and Sano: O.O Yes ma'am!

(Kenshin and Sano disappear)

Yusuke: -.-; That was random.

* * *

ED: Stupid authoress. She discovered our fangirl plot. You know what this means, MS?

MS: It means that it is time to resort to drastic measures…

Igor: Why don't I like the sound of that?

ED: Because these drastic measures are powerful weapons capable of destroying the universe in a single day! And with them, we are unstoppable!

Igor: Oh, thank goodness. I thought that you had found out that the coffee machine is broken.

MS: The coffee machine is broken! NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! T.T

Igor: I'm very sorry Masters, but it will take several days for it to be repaired and we have no money to buy another one.

ED: -.- Fine, here's ten dollars. Now go buy us some Starbucks. And go ahead and get yourself something while you're out.

Igor: YAY! Frappuccino! . Skips away

ED: Why did we hire him again?

MS: Because he's a hunchback and all good evil doctors and mad scientists have a hunchback to serve them. Plus he makes good coffee.

ED: … You have a point. Ah well, time to use the heavy artillery.

(Karasu walks in)

Karasu: You wanted to see me?

* * *

Kuwabara: Now what should we do?

(Everyone else shrugs)

(They walk into a store)

Yusuke: (Reading a sign) Yu Yu Hakusho DVD's… Why do we look so ugly in this picture?

Kurama, Hiei, Kuwabara?

Yusuke: (Pulls out marker) Let's see, my hair looks more gelled… And Hiei's hair is spikier… And Kurama's rose does not look like that… and Kuwabara is way more ugly…

Kuwabara: What the heck are you talking about, Urameshi? I am the hottest guy on our show!

Yusuke: (Pretends to vomit) As if…

(Yusuke and Kuwabara start fighting, while the sign looks horrible, covered with scribbles)

Store Manager: Fighting and drawing graffiti, eh, punks? Guess I better call the cops.

Kurama: I really think we should leave now… O.O

(Cops come riding up to the store on kangaroos)

Cop 1: G'day mate, what seems to be the trouble here?

Store Manager: These boys are creating a disturbance and they drew graffiti all over this sign.

Cop 2: (Drunk) (Hic) What be ye wantin' us t'do (hic) yer honor?

Store Manager: -.-# Arrest them, no da,

Cop 1: All right, keep yourself calm, mate. Billy Bob Joe, help me arrest this man.

Store Manager: WHAT! No, not me, you fools, arrest them!

Cop 2: (Hic) Yer disturbin' th' peace wit all yer carryin' on and (hic) suchlike. Now do please come quietly, (hic) yer honor.

Hiei: What are those bizarre animals?

Kurama: They're called kangaroos. They live in Australia.

Yusuke: Who wants to take a joyride!

(The four guys each jump on a kangaroo, because there are four of them for some reason, and ride away while the cops arrest the screaming store manager)

Yusuke: So now what should we do?

(As they ride the kangaroos down the street, wondering what to do, they pass a store with a giant sound system playing random music. A chibi hamster appears on the screen.)

Hamster: And now it's time for everyone's favorite random song, The Llama Song!

Kurama: Llama song! . (Singing)

_Here's a llama, _

_There's a llama, _

_And another little llama, _

_Fuzzy llama, _

_Funny llama, _

_Llama llama duck, _

_Llama llama cheesecake, _

_Llama tablet brick potato llama, _

_Llama llama mushroom llama, _

_Llama llama duck!_

Yusuke and Kuwabara: O.O

Hiei: (Singing)

_I was once a tree house, _

_I lived in a cake, _

_But I never saw the way, _

_The orange slayed the rake, _

_I was only three years dead, _

_But it told a tale, _

_And now listen little child, _

_To the safety rail!_

Yusuke and Kuwabara: O.O;;;

Kurama and Hiei: (Singing)

_Did you ever see a llama? _

_Kiss a llama? _

_On a llama, _

_Llama's llama, _

_Tastes of llama, _

_Llama llama duck, _

_Half a llama, _

_Twice the llama, _

_Not a llama, _

_Farmer llama, _

_Llama in a car, _

_Alarm a llama, _

_Llama duck, _

_Is that how its told now? _

_Is it all so old? _

_Is it made of lemon juice?_

_Doorknob, ankle cold, _

_Now my song is getting thin, _

_I've run out of luck, _

_Time for me to retire now, _

_And become a duck!_

Yusuke and Kuwabara: O.O;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Yusuke: They've gone insane!

Kuwabara: RUN AWAY!

(Kurama and Hiei ride away on their kangaroos, singing The Llama Song again)

* * *

A/N: Hee hee… yeah. I was high. What can I say? The Llama Song does exist, it's on and Saru, who has no life, wrote out the lyrics and sent me a copy, so I included it because that is the most random song ever. Everything else was all me! What now! (Does an Anime peace) Wow, I should stop getting so high on caffeine… but if I did, I wouldn't be writing this fic. Read and review peoples! Ja ne! 


	3. Karasu's Private Hell

Himizu-chan: (Stares at computer) OMG I LOVE YOU GUYS! Holy cow, this is the most reviews I've ever had for just two chapters! I think... It's certainly the fic with the largest number of different reviewers at least. Anywho... THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! I feel so loved. (Is very happy, although that might be because she had a Mountain Dew at 11:30 in the morning, the second earliest time when she actaully sleeps at night, not counting Mountain Dew binges at 4:00 am.) So, now for the reviewer responses.

Pure white cat: I'm so glad you think it's funny! I look forward to more reviews, although I didn't quite understand what you were talking about... but you said I'd see later, so I'll wait.

wonderingprophet: I'm sorry friend, but it's true. You have no life.Yes, yay for kangaroos!

Mystical Demon: Just for the record, that was the shortest review I've ever received, but I have obeyed. And I really don't care that it was only one word as long as people review, so if that's what you wanna do, be my guest! Thanks for reviewing.

IrishKitsune: Thank you, thank you. But please don't die! More randomness is coming and you need to be alive to enjoy it!

Xhu: (Nods) Yes, the llama song rocks. Thank you for saying that I rock. Although I feel sorry for the monkeys in your review... O.O

Well, as I said, thank you all for reviewing! I hope this chapter is just as satisfactory as the last chapter! Read and review! BTW, I wrote a portion of this while listening to Private Hell by Iggy Pop and Green Day, so that might account for a small part of the randomness in the story...

Disclaimer: I own only ED, MS, Igor, and most of the randomness! Oh yeah! Booyah! I do not own the Teletubbies. If I did, I would not own them, I would own their corpses, which would have bore marks of torture. (Laughs insanely)

* * *

ED: O.O Um… that was unexpected. (Stares in horror at Kurama and Hiei from the TV screen) 

Karasu: I quite agree… Remind me again why I'm in love with Kurama.

MS: Hell if I know!

Karasu: He's too crazy. I'm leaving.

ED: Get back here, you would be in hell right now if it weren't for us!

Karasu: At least hell isn't so random.

ED: -.- You have a point… But that is not the point!

Karasu: Look, this is stupid. I'm leaving.

MS: You can't just leave!

Karasu: Watch me!

Voice in the Sky: (You kinda knew I'd be back, didn't you?) You wanna leave? Your wish is my command!

(There is a sudden explosion and a cloud of smoke appears)

(Karasu disappears)

(Igor returns, drinking a giant Frappuccino)

Igor: Oh no, don't tell me. You tried make microwave pizza and the microwave exploded again.

ED: -.- No.

Igor: You made another baked potato explode in the microwave?

MS: -.- No.

Igor: You tried to cook another piece of dynamite and it blew up the kitchen?

ED: -.-; No…

Igor: You blew up the popcorn popper again?

MS: -.-; No…

Igor: That moldy cheddar cheese that I've been trying to make you throw out has come to life and blown up the kitchen, just like the Swiss cheese did last Halloween?

ED and MS: -.-# NO! That stupid authoress sent Karasu away!

Igor: Oh… good. We don't have enough money to pay for any more repairs or to pay bail.

ED and MS: -.-() Oh shut up and give us our coffee.

(In a random field full of butterflies, flowers, bunny rabbits, and all that good stuff)

(Karasu appears)

Karasu: What the hell?

Voice in the Sky: Hey, I didn't say you would enjoy the place I was taking you, did I? This is now your private hell.

Karasu: O.O But… it's so… pretty! Yuck!

Voice in the Sky: -.- No da. That's why it's your hell.

Karasu: I hate you.

Voice in the Sky: The feeling's mutual. But I'm forgetting the best part. HERE BOYS!

(Teletubbies appear)

Karasu: O.O Oh no…

Voice in the Sky: If you apologize, I might let you out.

Karasu: FORGET IT, YOU CLOWN!

Voice in the Sky: You… called… me…a… CLOWN! DIE, BASTARD!

(A shower of bricks comes pouring out of the sky onto Karasu's head)

Karasu: PLEASE STOP! I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!

Voice in the Sky: It's too late. I might have let you go, but now… Grr… this calls for heavy artillery.

(An army of green radioactive ghetto hamsters comes running out of nowhere and all start attacking Karasu)

Karasu: HHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

Voice in the Sky: Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Kurama: (Stops singing) I don't quite understand it, but I have the strangest feeling that Himizu is torturing someone…

Hiei: (Also stops singing) Just your imagination.

(At that wonderful moment, a herd of guinea pigs came charging down the middle of the street chasing a band of chipmunks.)

Guinea Pigs: Give us back our cheese you striped bastards!

Chipmunks: NEVER!

Guinea Pigs: Then you shall perish! GET THEM!

(Chipmunks begin looking around frantically for a place to hide. They see Hiei and suddenly charge at him, looking as though they've seen their savior.)

Chipmunks: Our savior! Our savior! (They continue to race towards Hiei)

Hiei: (Completely freaked out) Get the hell away from me, you freaks!

(Chipmunks jump on Hiei and hide in his hair)

Hiei: (Screaming like a girl) AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Runs around waving his hands, still screaming like a girl)

Yusuke and Kuwabara: O.O (Fall on the ground, laughing so hard that they're crying)

Kurama: O.O Um… This isn't good…

Hiei: HHHEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP! GET THEM OUT OF MY HAIR!

(The guinea pigs don't bother to slow their charge and they all jump onto Hiei as well)

Guinea Pigs: He is an ally of the hated chipmunks! Show no mercy! (They proceed to attack Hiei)

Hiei: HHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPP! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Yusuke and Kuwabara: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! (They pass out because they have not inhaled for several minutes)

Kurama: (Thinking fast) Look! A sparrow stole the popcorn and just ran into that warehouse over there!

Guinea Pigs and Chipmunks: NOOOOOOOOO! Not the popcorn!

Guinea Pigs: We will forgive your act of stealing our cheese if you agree to help us liberate the popcorn from the evil sparrows.

Chipmunks: It's a bargain!

(Guinea Pigs and Chipmunks shake paws, glare at the warehouse, then jump off Hiei and charge off screaming war cries)

Guinea Pigs and Chipmunks: YYYAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! DIE YOU FREAKY FEATHERED FREEBOOTERS! YOU SHALL PAY FOR STEALING OUR POPCORN!

Hiei: (Lying on the ground, twitching like mad) Furry…fuzzy… rodent…things… (Eye twitches)

Kurama: Are you okay?

Hiei: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Kurama: -.- Guess not…

ED: Wow, even more unexpected… Hiei is afraid of fluffy things…

MS: …… (Is too dumbstruck to reply)

ED: Enough of these foolish games! If we are going to drive them mad, we must do something so horrible, so crazy, that they will go screaming to the world that the world is being taken over by cats and orthodontists!

MS: What if we send an envoy to the blue aliens?

ED: (Can't believe his ears) You, sir, are without a doubt the most insane and incredibly idiotic person I have ever met. You're brilliant!

* * *

A/N: What can I say? That was really fun to write. The thing with the chipmunks and guinea pigs came to me randomly, just like most everything I've written, which is probably why everyone likes it so much. If there are any Hiei fangirls out there, please don't hurt me, but this was too good to pass up! (Cringes) If there are any Karasu fangirls out there, you should get a new guy. That's advice from someone with the interests of Karasu dying at heart. (Laughs evilly) If you wanna see Karasu humiliated beyond your wildest dreams, you should read my Big-Screen TV's and Nuclear Bombs fic in a few chapters, big Karasu torture coming up in another two or three chapters! Read and review! Ja ne! 


	4. Blue Aliens and Santa Claus

Himizu-chan: X.X

Ryouko: (Pokes Himizu-chan) You'll have to forgive her... she has an absolute mountain of math homework... she's been drinking Mountain Dew and working on it for hours and I think her mind has finally snapped.

Himizu-chan: My math teacher is the spawn of Satan.

Ryouko: I know Himizu-chan... but there's some nice reviewers at the door. They looked peaceful for a while, but I think they're getting restless.

Himizu-chan: Lucky them. I wrote another chapter. At least, I think I did. (Checks computer) Yep, I did.

Ryouko. -.- You are really out of it today, aren't you?

Himizu-chan: Huh?

Ryouko: -.- I rest my case.

Review Response:

wonderingprophet: Yes, torturing Karasu is fun. (Laughs likea maniac) And you gotta love the chipmunks! Chipmunks rule!

Kato Shingetsu: O.O Wow, what a name. I can't type today, so I had to type it about ten times before I got it right... at least, I think I got it right... I hope I got it right... (Passes out again, is hit on the head by Ryouko) Anywho! Glad to learn that I got a new reviewer! I have updated! I'm glad to hear you love it!

Mystical Demon: For the record, I don't care if you're lazy, as long as you review. (Cracks up at Mystical Demon's image) Yeah, I thought of something along those lines, only the chipmunks were running, so I was kinda thinking something like what pilgrims do, walk a few steps, then kneel and bow, then get up and keep walking, then do it again... Yeah. Poor Hiei. I'm so mean. (Laughs like a maniac) Thanks for the review!

I shall update as the randomness comes to me! Now, off to do math homework! (Takes three steps, passes out again) I think I need another Mountain Dew...

* * *

Hiei: Are they gone?

Kurama: Yes, they're gone. Are you okay?

Hiei: I think so… (Scratches head, a chipmunk jumps out and runs to the warehouse)

Kuwabara and Yusuke: (Wake up) Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Yusuke: That was the most hilarious thing I've ever seen!

Kuwabara: Ha ha ha ha ha! The shrimp is afraid of fluffy things! Ha ha ha ha ha!

Hiei: -.-# (Pulls out katana)

Kuwabara and Yusuke: O.O AAAAAHHHHHHHHH! (Run away)

* * *

ED: (Talking on the phone) Is this the leader of the blue aliens? It is? YOU are the leader…? No, sir, it's perfectly acceptable, I was just taken by surprise… No, I'm not trying to offend you... Yes, of course… Yes, we have a preposition to make to you… Yes, it involves chaos, pain, and destruction… You'll do it? Great! Of course we'll pay you well for your services… Yes we have plenty of money! (Crosses fingers) You'll be here in half an hour to discuss the terms? Wonderful! See you then. Good-bye.

MS: Well?

ED: (Collapses into chair) Their leader is one of the most frightening figures I could ever have imagined!

MS: Who is it? Ronald McDonald?

ED: No, worse.

MS: Big Bird?

ED: No, worse.

MS: Barney?

ED: Even worse.

MS: That bad, eh?

ED: Yep. Any more guesses?

MS: Nope… Unless it's…

Mysterious Person: HO HO HO!

MS: Oh no…

ED: Yep. Remember, this was your idea.

MS: Oh shit…

* * *

Yusuke: Is it just me, or did the air suddenly get colder?

Kuwabara: It feels…festive… in a really creepy sorta way.

Kurama: It's a terrible presence… something that we'll never be able to get away from. Like an incredibly powerful demon…

Hiei: I smell… blood… and roasting chestnuts… you know that's actually a very tasty dish.

Kuwabara: Oh, that was sick! You didn't need to share that, shrimp!

Hiei: -.-# Stop calling me that! Grr…

* * *

Mysterious Person: HO HO HO!

ED: Remember, he is going to be our ally… we better not offend him.

MS: Right. I just hope he didn't bring…

Mysterious Person: I hope you don't mind if I bring my secretary in!

MS: Oh no…

ED: (Death glare at MS) Of course, sir, bring your secretary in if you want! Make yourself at home!

Santa Claus: Now, you wanted to talk about an attack using my blue aliens?

ED: Yes sir, we did.

Santa Claus: Then let's talk. Rudolph, come take notes!

(Rudolph walks in, sits down, and begins taking notes)

ED and MS: O.O

Igor: Will you be taking any coffee, sirs?

ED: Mr. Claus, will you and your… secretary… join us for coffee?

Santa Claus: No thank you. If you have some eggnog, I'll take that. If you don't have that, then we'll be fine. But can we please get the terms of this attack?

MS: Certainly. (Turns TV monitor so Santa can see it) These four boys are subjects of our latest experiment. We are trying to crack their minds so we can probe and control their minds. To crack them, we need to drive them insane. You can help.

Santa Claus: (Death glare) And how can myself and my blue aliens help with the trivial task of driving those pathetic boys insane? (Pissed off)

ED: Oh, no, you completely misunderstand! These boys can't be driven mad by simple methods such as little old ladies or crazy chipmunks and guinea pigs! Only powerful fighters that they can't defeat can drive them mad. We want you to send everything you have at these boys, harass them, defeat them, and bring them back here. If you do your job correctly, those boys will be driven mad and submit to our powerful mind-controlling devices and WE SHALL RULE THE WORLD! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Santa Claus: (Seriously ticked off) YOU will rule the world! YOU! You are nothing but pathetic humans!

MS: What are you then?

Santa Claus: I AM AN ALMIGHTY POWERFUL IMMORTAL DEMONIC BEING!

ED and MS: O.O

Santa Claus: And once my blue aliens join forces with the Cosmic Sheep we will rule the world!

MS: But… but I wanted the Cosmic Sheep… (Sniff)

Santa Claus: Come, Rudolph! We must contact the Cosmic Sheep at once and complete this task and begin our reign of terror and turmoil! (Runs out, followed by Rudolph) On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer and Vixen! On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen!

(Santa and his reindeer fly away)

ED: Well… that went well.

MS: He's going to steal my Cosmic Sheep! T.T

Igor: And… where are we going to get the money to pay them?

ED: Leave that to me!

Igor: Great… We're doomed.

MS: WWWAAAHHHHH! T.T

* * *

Santa Claus: HO HO HO!

Yusuke: WTF! Christmas is over! It's April for crying out loud!

Kuwabara: O.O ……. (Too freaked out to talk) (Grabs Yusuke's sleeve and shakes frantically)

Yusuke: -.- What is it Kuwabara?

Kuwabara: O.O ……. (Still too freaked out to talk) (Points at the sky)

Hiei, Kurama, and Yusuke: (Look up) O.O

Sleigh Bell: Jingle jingle bonk! (Lands on Kuwabara's head)

Kuwabara: . … (Knocked out)

Kurama, Hiei, and Yusuke: -.-

Santa's hat: Plop! (Lands on Yusuke's head)

Yusuke: I CAN'T SEE! I CAN'T SEE! (Runs away and crashes into a tree) .

Kurama and Hiei: -.-

Santa's Big Bag of Toys: THUD! (Lands on the ground where Kurama and Hiei were standing)

Kurama and Hiei: -.- (Standing in a tree where they jumped to avoid being hit by anything)

Santa: #& #& #!

Kurama: O.O Whatever happened to just 'ho ho ho'?

Hiei: I dunno, but I think it's an improvement.

Kurama: O.O Santa is the idol of small children! He gives them presents! He shouldn't teach them how to curse!

Hiei: Those deprived children need to get a new idol then.

Kurama: You may be right… What about the Easter Bunny?

Hiei: (Shifty eyes) He met an untimely demise…

Kurama: O.O Hiei, you didn't!

Hiei: No, I didn't.

Kurama: Phew.

Hiei: My dragon on the other hand…

Kurama: O.O You really don't have a heart, do you?

Hiei: Nope.

Kurama: -.-

(Santa suddenly rings a giant bell)

Bell: Ding-dong the witch is dead!

Kurama and Hiei: -.-

(Giant spaceships come flying up with about 5,000 giant blue aliens with seven long tentacles, five eyes, and lots of deadly weapons climbing out to do battle)

Kurama: We just might need backup.

Hiei: Maybe… at least one more person should be enough.

Kurama: Sounds great.

Hiei: I kinda feel sorry for those pathetic aliens.

Santa Claus: But this is not all of my vast army!

Cosmic Sheep: BAH! KILL! BAH!

(About 5,000 neon-green sheep armed with weapons of mass destruction appear on the ground, surrounding Kurama, Hiei, and the unconscious Yusuke and Kuwabara)

Hiei: Ok… maybe we'll need two people for backup…

* * *

Whew... Writing fics when I'm half-dead and loaded with math homework... Tell me what you think, but I'm not doing that again. I don't care what my math teacher says. Now, the blue aliens led by Santa Claus came from Saru and her friend Amber. I just took a few... creative liberties, like adding Rudolph. The Cosmic Sheep are annoying pests. They're trying to kill me. Very sad. I think I invented them, but I'm not sure... It's a story I wrote a long time ago... Oh well... Randomness forever! Read and Review! Ja ne! 


	5. Attack of the Cats and Orthodontists

A/N: You probably don't wanna hear it, but I have to say that I'm having trouble getting my random fits lately, which explains why I'm not updating nearly as often as I'd like to... -.-; Oh well. Thank you for all the wonderful reviews.

Cresent Moon of The Night Sky: I will continue as long as the randomness continues. We'll see how that turns out... But after a long day at school, randomness is a good thing.

Kato Shingetsu: Personally, I don't think there's anything wrong with Florida. I like Florida. But I shouldn't talk, cuz I live in Ohio. XD I'm not a redneck, but my grandpa says he is. I think he's a hillbilly though. So no hillbilly jokes, please. Other than that, funny review, lol! I would actually enjoy more of those.

Saru: Well, you don't have to review. But then I won't update. And I couldn't care less if you twitched and you have no aliens. Santa took them all. Evil thing.

So yeah. I'll try to update again soon, but I dunno if I'll be able to cuz I have a killer Marine Bio project due on Monday and it's kinda worth a third of my grade... X.X So don't expect any updates for a while.

Disclaimer: Must we? I own the randomness. Soon I shall be the godess of randomness! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha!

* * *

(The Cosmic Sheep pulled out nukes and charged forward, baa-ing for all they were worth. The blue aliens readied their laser guns and they flew forward in their weird flying saucers. People everywhere were running for cover)

Kurama: Mew… I DON'T WANNA DIE!

Hiei: -.- Shaddup fool. (Begins to kick Yusuke and Kuwabara) Come on bakas, wake up, damn you!

Kuwabara: No Mommy, I don't wanna go to school with Shizuru. She makes me carry her book bag and she snuffs out her cigarettes in my hair.

Hiei: That would explain your dead brain cells… they've been fried.

Kuwabara: Huh? Hiei? What the hell are you kicking me for, shrimp?

Hiei: -.- I thought I told you to stop calling me that!

Yusuke: Go away Keiko. I hate school.

Hiei: -.- Morons.

Yusuke: Huh?

Hiei: -.- I rest my case.

Kurama: I really think we should be somewhere else. They're pointing missiles at us.

Yusuke: Missiles? What? Who's pointing missiles at us?

Hiei: Fools.

Kurama: They're going to shoot us now.

Hiei: Damn them all. I don't want to die by their damn missiles. Let other fools do that. (Jumps into a tree and then onto a building)

Kuwabara: What's with the sheep? Hey, it's Santa!

Kurama, Yusuke, and Hiei slap their heads, then Yusuke and Kurama jumped onto the building with Hiei)

Santa: Ready, aim, fire!

Missile: Woosh! BOOM!

Cosmic Sheep and Blue Aliens: Hooray!

Kuwabara: AAAAHHHHHHH! GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF, GETEMOFF!

(Kuwabara lying on the ground covered with preying mantises which are pinching him viciously.)

Hiei: -.- This is their big weapon?

More Missiles: BOOM! (Building blows up)

(All three fall to the ground, somehow unharmed)

Cosmic Sheep 1: (Seizes Hiei and holds a small knife to his throat) You are our prisoner.

Hiei: Very funny. That silly Swiss army knife doesn't scare me.

Cosmic Sheep 1: Heh. (Knife suddenly grows a foot long, pricking Hiei's throat)

Hiei: (Eye twitch) All right… It's not silly.

(All four boys are suddenly prisoners)

Santa: Mwa ha ha! No one can stand against me and my army of blue aliens and Cosmic Sheep! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha!

Yusuke: I hate to do this, but I'm thinking we need to ask for help…

Voice in the Sky: No, ya think? Idiots… I guess I better help you… All YYH fans would maul me if I let you be killed by a bunch of green sheep… never mind that those things have the power to wipe out this entire planet except for the fact that they want to kill me first. Oh well. You guys owe me big for this. HEY SHEEP! YO! UP HERE, YOU WOOLY BAGS OF MINDLESS FLUFF! I KNOW YOUR SECRETS! I'VE BEEN TO YOUR HEADQUARTERS! I HAVE THE POWER TO DESTROY YOU! DON'T YOU JUST WANT TO KILL ME!

Cosmic Sheep: It is the girl! Quick, we must slay her! Hurry! Bah, bah, kill, bah!

Santa: Come back here, you lackeys! Stupid sheep…

Voice in the Sky: Mwa ha ha ha ha ha! Come and get me, you stupid woolen sweaters from Hell!

Cosmic Sheep: We'll get you yet!

Santa: STOP!

(Sheep drop the four boys and run off to try to find the Voice in the Sky)

Kurama: Good thing they're so dumb…

Yusuke: Tell me about it. Now let's teach these blue octopi a lesson.

(The four boys get up, ready to do battle when…)

: Meow! Meow, kill!

Kuwabara: Kitties!

Hiei: You're kidding me. Himizu's lost her mind.

Voice in the Sky: HEY! I heard that, creep.

Hiei: Good. Now get rid of the maniac cats.

Voice in the Sky: Love to, can't.

Hiei: Why not?

Voice in the Sky: What, get rid of them? You've gotta be kidding! They're out to kill me, and they're a hell of a lot smarter than those sheep! Besides that, I didn't write them in. This story's gotten away from me. I'm no longer in control. I need to go find some backup.

Yusuke: What the hell? Are you saying you can't help us anymore!

Voice in the Sky: Pretty much, yeah. I can't do anything about them. Sorry guys. But here's something that might help you hold them off until I get back.

(Bags of catnip, kryptonite, and photos of crooked teeth appeared in front of them)

Hiei: Do we wanna know?

Voice in the Sky: Probably not… Just use them, unless you wanna be pushing up daisies. I'll be back as soon as I can!

Cats: Where did the Cosmic Sheep go? They were going to lead us to the hated Himizu! Those treacherous sheep! They have betrayed us! They shall pay!

: But until then… kill the blue aliens! They are trying to take over the world! That makes them our enemies! Slay, my sweet little cats, slay them!

Yusuke: Oh dear God…

Kuwabara: Kitties!

Cats: Meow! (Begin mauling Kuwabara)

Kuwabara: Ow! Ow! Stop it! You sweet little kitties, why are you hurting me! Ow, ow!

Hiei, Yusuke, and Kurama: -.- Good God…

Cats: Yahahhahha! (Begin randomly shooting random buildings and crap with their machine guns… o.O)

Hiei: (Throws bags of catnip over his shoulder) Fetch.

Cats: CATNIP! YAY! Meow meow meow!

: Come back here and help me defeat the blue aliens!

Cats: You're mean to us! We don't like you!

: I am your master! You must obey me! Get back here, you ungrateful fleabags!

Kurama: Well, now I know why Himizu gave us kryptonite.

Superman: Come back here, you unappreciative felines!

Hiei and Yusuke: All righty then.

Kuwabara: Where'd the kitties go!

Hiei: They left.

Kuwabara: No more kitties! T.T

Hiei: They just tried to kill you.

Kuwabara: The kitties would never do that! They love me! I must find them again! Kitties! (Runs off)

Yusuke: Well, he just went off to meet death… What's next?

Superman: The cats left me! They are traitors to the cause! I shall make them pay! But first, we must defeat the blue aliens, Santa Claus, and those four… three… humans!

Hiei: -.-# H…Humans…? Grr… (Draws sword and promptly kills every single blue alien… why he didn't kill Superman is sort of beyond everyone… whatever)

Superman: You are robbing me of my victims in my assent to supreme ruler! You shall be punished! Get him!

: Let's give him braces! Let's pull his teeth around until he screams for mercy!

Kurama: Oh dear…

Orthodontists: Mwa ha ha ha ha! Let us use our diabolical instruments of torture to cause pain in the mouths of every person in the world!

Yusuke: I'll handle this! (Seizes pictures of crooked teeth) Ha ha!

Orthodontists: O.O

Yusuke: Yes! Feast your eyes on these! Crooked teeth! Look at these overbites and massive gaps!

Orthodontists: NOO! Horrid nasty offensive images blatantly mocking our noble profession!

Yusuke: (Makes paper airplanes out of the pictures and throws them at the orthodontists) Ha ha! We mock you and your so-called 'noble' job! Just try and put braces on these pearly whites! (Flashes a mocking smile at the freaked-out orthodontists)

Hiei: -.- Show-off…

ED: (Watching everything on that moving camera thing) Well… That was most unexpected… Still, Superman is a powerful foe and I don't think they'll be able to get away from him.

MS: Yeah… and neither will we when he tries to take over the world instead of us…

ED: -.- Keep your smart-assed opinions to yourself, Mr. Gloom and Doom.

MS: Keep in mind that I'm the one that made that camera and that brain-probe… Without me, you'd still be sitting in that office on Washington, poisoning little old ladies after you managed to change their wills so that all the money was left to your office, which you later embezzled from…

ED: -.-# You fight dirty.

Igor: Why me? That's all I wanna know! Why me?

* * *

A/N: I do not own any cats, orthodontists, or Superman. Wouldn't want to either, come to that. X.X Read and Review! Ja ne! 


	6. Monkeys and Armadillos

A/N: I have officially kept this fic going for more than a month! All must praise me! Bwa ha ha! (Gets hit on the head with a frying pan) Owie! Oh well. Anywho, I was informed by the little voices in my head that I forgot to mention something at the end of my last chapter, so I'll mention it now. The cats came from a picture on the Internet of a cat holding a machine gun (o.O), my allergy to cats, and random stupid conversations between me and Saru. The orthodontists came from Ryouko always complaining about them. Superman leading the cats came from Saru. I think that's right. Oh well. I have not been feeling random lately, but I just chugged a can of Mountain Dew and wrote this chapter while I was supposed to be working of geometry homework. Oh well. Now, review responses!

wonderingprophet: (Eyebrow twitch) I wondered where my flamethrower went... You can blame the Mountain Dew on this one...

Kato Shingetsu: Numa numa song! I really should make Yusuke sing that... There's always chapter 7... But I need the lyrics... That's what the Internet is for... Hehe, good review, yours make me smile. BTW, I've been wanting to ask you this, who's Holly?

So that's it for the reviews. I'm tired now and need to do math, so I shall make this short. Only 15 more days of school, then summertime! P.S. C.S.I. season finale tonight! Yay! C.S.I. rox!

* * *

Orthodontists: (Set the pictures on fire with flamethrowers… o.O) Ha ha! The terrible images are gone!

Yusuke: O.O Shit…

Kurama: Need… new… plan… fast!

Hiei: Hn.

Yusuke: Where the hell is Kuwabaka the distraction when you need him?

* * *

(In a random field)

Kuwabara: Where am I? Where are the kitties?

Cats: Ready… aim… fire!

(Cats fire machine guns at Kuwabara)

Kuwabara: O.O OH NO! (Runs like hell)

* * *

Yusuke: Ok, it's obvious he's not gonna show up, so let's fight normally. Spirit gun! (Fires spirit gun)

Orthodontist 1: AUGH! (Falls over)

Yusuke: Oh yeah! Spirit shotgun! (Kills more orthodontists)

Hiei: Hn. (Takes out katana and proceeds to chop up orthodontists)

Kurama: We're in the human world… we shouldn't be doing this…

Hiei: Look around fool. There are no humans within fifty miles; they've all fled the blue aliens and those creepy sheep.

Kurama: Good point. Rosewhip! (Kills orthodontists with rosewhip)

(Orthodontists are now dead)

Yusuke: (Cracks knuckles) Oh, this is a good day. Just the superhero in spandex left to deal with. What fun.

Superman: So you think you're about to win, eh? Well, what do you think about this!

(Dead orthodontists suddenly stand up and advance towards the three boys carrying their instruments of torture)

Kurama: Zombie orthodontists?

Hiei: Hn…

Yusuke: Damn! How do we get rid of these?

Kurama: Perhaps if we killed their leader…?

Yusuke: Hey, that's a great idea!

Hiei: Hn…

Yusuke: (Punches Hiei) Damnit, say something else already!

Hiei: Baka…

Yusuke: -.- Better…

Hiei: -.-# (Takes out katana and tries to kill Superman, but accidentally trips over the kryptonite, which conveniently covers Superman… oo)

Superman: Augh! My powers! They're draining! I'm melting! I'm melting!

Kurama, Yusuke, and Hiei: -.-() Baka…

Superman: NOOO! (Melts)

Hiei: … Yay! The witch is dead! Ding-dong the witch is dead! Which old witch? The wicked witch! Ding-dong the wicked witch is dead! (Dances around like a maniac) Bwa ha ha ha ha ha! (He's so OOC… ain't it great?)

Kurama and Yusuke: O.O

Orthodontist Zombies: Blood… death… braces!

Yusuke: Ya know, I actually forgot about them for a minute there.

Kurama: Was that such a bad thing?

Yusuke: Not really…

Kuwabara: AAAHHHHHHHHHHH!

Yusuke, Hiei, and Kurama: O.O What the…?

Armadillos: Kill the baka, kill the baka, kill the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Kill the baka, kill the baka, kill the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him!

Hiei, Kurama, and Yusuke: O.O;;;

Kuwabara: HELP!

Armadillos: Kill the baka, kill the baka, kill the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Kill the baka, kill the baka, kill the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him!

(Kuwabara runs past them, still screaming his head off, and still be chased by murderous armadillos)

Monkeys: Get the armadillos! They stole the bananas!

Kurama, Yusuke, and Hiei: -.-()

Hiei: Damn Himizu and her random mind. I bet this fic is connected to her brain and we're seeing her visions.

(A giant anvil falls from the sky and lands on Hiei. There is a sign on it saying, 'You have stumbled into the perimeter of wisdom. Get out. But while you're in here, pity me because I have to watch these images every day of my life. You all suck!')

Kurama: -.-() I never knew Himizu was so disturbed.

Hiei: Are you freaking crazy! Of course she is! All you have to do is look at her, and you can see it!

(Another anvil falls from the sky and lands on Hiei. This time it has a sign saying, 'I really cherish your opinions about me, you conceited little midget bastard!')

Yusuke: Well, we've all learned a lesson here…

Monkeys: Zombies! Maybe they have the bananas! Get them! (Monkeys proceed to kill zombie orthodontists and rip them apart and throw them to the Cosmic Sheep so the sheep eat them and they all get poisoned and die…) No bananas! Quick, find the armadillos! (Monkeys run off)

Kurama: And the lesson would be?

Yusuke: O.O Monkeys are damn useful to have around if you're being attacked by a mob of zombie orthodontists.

Kurama: … (Falls over)

Hiei: Hn…

* * *

ED: They beat Superman!

MS: Praise God! Now we may live!

ED: But… the boys are still running free!

MS: Not for long…

Igor: Okay, I'm going to go make popcorn so I can have something to eat while I watch you crackpots try yet again to put an end to the world and humanity as we know it.

ED: Watch how you talk to your superiors lackey!

Igor: Yes, Master… (Muttering) Mean bastard…

* * *

A/N: The monkeys and armadillos came to me randomly just a few minutes ago when I was writing this... Weird, eh? Oh well, more randomness next chapter! Read and Review! Ja ne! 


	7. Numa Numa Song

A/N: I surprise myself sometimes. Here I am after only 3 days, updating. O.O Something must be wrong up here. (Taps head) Randomness good. Anywho, this chapter is a bit longer than normal (to make up for the short one from 3 days ago... X.X) and I hope you enjoy it. Reveiw Responses!

Kato Shingetsu: Thanks for giving me permission to use Holly in this chapter. I interpreted her character from what she's said in the reviews, I hope I didn't make her too OOC...

Hehe... That's all the reviews I got for this one. Oh well. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own the Anime characters or the Numa Numa song, but I do own the creepy villains and any animals that show up. I also don't own Holly, she belongs to Kato Shingetsu.

* * *

Yusuke: Well, now that that's been taken care of… where's Kuwabara? 

Kuwabara: HELP! (Runs past)

Armadillos: Kill the baka, kill the baka, kill the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Kill the baka, kill the baka, kill the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him!

Yusuke, Kurama, and Hiei: -.-()

Kurama: What happened to the monkeys?

Kuwabara: They went home! They wanted banana milkshakes!

Yusuke, Kurama, and Hiei: -.-()

Hiei: Hn… Baka…

Kuwabara: HELP! (Falls over and is grabbed by the armadillos)

Armadillos: Mwa ha ha ha ha! We have captured the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Mwa ha ha ha ha!

Kuwabara: WAHHHH! SAVE ME! T.T

(Armadillos drag Kuwabara off to… somewhere… most likely a torture chamber of sorts)

Yusuke: Do we want to know what he did to make them so mad?

Hiei: Hn. He probably deserved it.

Voice in the Sky: Well, I'm glad to see you're all still alive… where's Kookaburra?

Kurama: He was… captured… by… armadillos…

Voice in the Sky: Sounds like him. Anywho, I've found you some backup. She'll help you out while I find Ryouko and Saru.

Yusuke: WHAT! That's your idea of reinforcements! Those two are as crazy as you!

Voice in the Sky: Shut up baka. Now, Holly, play nice with these sweet little boys. Ta ta!

Holly: (Loaned to me courtesy to Kato Shingetsu… Thanks Kato!) Woohoo! Hi everybody! I'm Holly! I'm a telekinetic kick boxer!

Yusuke: And a first-class freak if you are in any way acquainted with Himizu.

Holly: -.-# (Uses a kick boxing move and whacks Yusuke a good one)

Hiei and Kurama: o.O All righty then.

(Numa Numa song randomly starts playing)

Holly: Music!

Yusuke: Numa numa?

Holly: Numa numa?

Yusuke: Numa numa!

Holly: Numa numa!

Yusuke and Holly: NUMA NUMA!

(They begin doing the Numa Numa dance… o.O)

Yusuke and Holly: (Singing)

_Ma-ia-hii_

_Ma-ia-huu_

_Ma-ia-hoo_

_Ma-ia-haha_

_Ma-ia-hii_

_Ma-ia-huu_

_Ma-ia-hoo_

_Ma-ia-haha_

_Ma-ia-hii_

_Ma-ia-huu_

_Ma-ia-hoo_

_Ma-ia-haha_

_Ma-ia-hii_

_Ma-ia-huu_

_Ma-ia-hoo_

_Ma-ia-haha_

_Alo, Salut, sunt eu, un haiduc,_

_Si te rog, iubirea mea, primeste fericirea_

_Alo, alo, sunt eu Picasso,_

_Ti-am dat beep, si sunt voinic,_

_Dar sa stii nu-ti cer nimic_

_Vrei sa pleci dar nu ma, nu ma iei,_

_Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei._

_Chipul tau si dragostea din tei,_

_Mi-amintesc de ochii tai._

_Vrei sa pleci dar nu ma, nu ma iei,_

_Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei._

_Chipul tau si dragostea din tei,_

_Mi-amintesc de ochiii tai._

_Te sun, sa-ti spun, ce simt acum,_

_Alo, iubirea mea, sunt eu, fericirea._

_Alo, alo, sunt iarasi eu, Picasso,_

_Ti-am dat beep, si sunt voinic,_

_Dar sa stii nu-ti cer nimic._

_Vrei sa pleci dar nu ma, nu ma iei,_

_Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei._

_Chipul tau si dragostea din tei,_

_Mi-amintesc de ochiii tai_

_Ma-ia-hii_

_Ma-ia-huu_

_Ma-ia-hoo_

_Ma-ia-haha_

_Vrei sa pleci dar nu ma, nu ma iei,_

_Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei._

_Chipul tau si dragostea din tei,_

_Mi-amintesc de ochiii tai_

Hiei and Kurama: O.O;;;

Yusuke and Holly: Numa numa!

Hiei and Kurama: O.O;;; Dear God…

* * *

ED: O.O 

MS: o.O

Igor: Numa numa!

ED and MS: -.-

* * *

Holly: That was sooo awesome! Let's do it again! 

Yusuke and Holly: (Singing)

_Ma-ia-hii_

_Ma-ia-huu_

_Ma-ia-hoo_

Ma-ia-haha… 

Kurama: (Whips out duct tape and slaps it over their mouths) That's enough of that.

Yusuke and Holly: MPH! (Translations: Damn!)

Hiei: Thank God that's over.

Kurama: (Nod nod) o.o

Voice in the Sky: UNHAND THAT GIRL!

Kurama and Hiei: Meep! Yes ma'am!

Voice in the Sky: Good puppies. Ok Holly thanks for the distraction, now I gotta send you back to Kato.

Holly: KK!

Voice in the Sky: (Holds out a Bag of Magical Unlimited Candies) Here, take one of these for you and one for Kato. Just think of a candy and it'll give you as many as you want. Thanks for your help. Thank Kato for me.

Holly: Woohoo! Candy! (Uses her telekinetic powers to take the bags and is transported back to wherever she lives)

Hiei: (Lifts eyebrow) Distraction?

Voice in the Sky: Did I say that? I never said anything like that.

Hiei: Liar.

Voice in the Sky: Midget.

Hiei: Freak.

Voice in the Sky: Jerk.

Hiei: Crack head.

Voice in the Sky: Dwarf.

Hiei: Witch.

Voice in the Sky: Bastard.

Hiei: Clown.

Voice in the Sky: O.O You… you… you…

Hiei: I…?

Voice in the Sky: YOU CALLED ME A CLOWN! DIE!

(Bricks, boulders, anvils, and other hard objects rain down on Hiei's head)

Hiei: ---------------(Censored)------------------

Voice in the Sky: You called me a clown! You shall be taken to the PRIVATE HELL!

Hiei?.?

Voice in the Sky: Mwa ha ha ha ha!

* * *

What am I going to do to Hiei? I'll give you a hint... Remember what I did to Karasu back in chapter three. (Evil cackle) Once again, thank you Kato for letting me use Holly. I hope you like your gift! Everybody, read and review! Ja ne! 


	8. Pink Rabbits and Traumitized Crows

A/N: I haven't updated in a while, have I? Oh well... (Sigh) I'm having trouble getting ideas for this one... (Sigh again) Exams are coming up... (Sigh for a third time) But it's almost summer vacation... (Tries to be happy, but dies from geometry)

Anywho... review respones:

Kato Shingetsu: You're welcome. I'm glad you liked your candy. Thanks for the review.

The Mega-doomer: You would willingly take the Cosmic Sheep! (Kneels and proceeds to bow to Mega-doomer) Bless you child! And you're right, Kurama and Hiei have no room to talk. I'd make Kuwa sing, but can you imagine? (Dies at the thought) Horrid voice he must have... his speaking voice is bad enough...

A/N: That's all for now. Hope you guys like this one!

* * *

(In a certain field… with Teletubies… and a traumatized crow demon…)

Karasu: (Whimper) I don't like this. I wanna go home. I want my mommy.

(Hiei appears)

Hiei: Where the hell is this place?

Karasu: Apparently this is Himizu-chan's new torture chamber.

Hiei: Whee…

Voice in the Sky: You know what, I'm sick of being a voice. I'm going to resort to my character form.

(A teenage girl suddenly appears… That's all the details you're getting. Mwa ha ha ha ha!)

Himizu-chan: Much better.

Karasu: I'm sorry for calling you a clown. Can I go home?

Himizu-chan: NO, YOU MAKAI-DAMNED BASTARD!

(Karasu is now flat)

Hiei: What are you going to do?

Himizu-chan: Leave you here.

Hiei: What?

Himizu-chan: You heard me. Sayonara. (Vanishes)

Hiei: WITCH!

Voice in the Sky: Shut up! Or you'll stay here even longer.

Hiei: Boohoo.

Voice in the Sky: Suit yourself.

(An army of cute fluffy pink bunnies appears)

Pink Bunny 1: Look! Victims! Get them!

Pink Bunnies: Yay! Let's go find people to hug!

Hiei: Jesus! Get away from me you pink rabbits!

Karasu: T.T Mommy.

Kurama: Do I wanna know what she did with them?

Yusuke: Probably not.

Voice in the Sky: Have either of you noticed that you haven't seen Karasu in this fic?

Kurama: Did you kill him? (Looks hopeful)

Voice in the Sky: If I did, then that must be what I did with Hiei… They both called me a clown. I'm not a goddamn child killing mother fucking Makai-damned bastard, which is the exact definition of clown since I just now proclaimed that it was.

Kurama: o.O

Yusuke: Well, Ryouko would kill you if you killed Hiei, so you probably didn't kill Hiei, which probably means that you didn't kill Karasu.

Voice in the Sky: The detective has a brain. It's the apocalypse!

Kurama: Damn. I still have a stalker.

Voice in the Sky: Stalkers are creepy. I've had about six or seven different guys stalk me in a mall and I've been stalked about five thousand times by various members of the Cosmic Sheep because we all know they're going to kill me if I give them half a chance. You get used to it after a while.

Kurama: Not if you're in constant fear of being molested.

Voice in the Sky: Well, I certainly don't get that from the sheep, but one of the guys that was stalking me asked me out, another asked me for my number, and another was like fifty years old, so I've been close.

Kurama: O.O The breadth of your experience never ceases to astound and frighten me.

Voice in the Sky: And did I mention I was stalked in a corn maze by a little dude dressed in black carrying a plastic axe, a dead chicken, and a chainsaw? That was kinda creepy. He stole the chainsaw from a Jason and was chasing me and he hit me with his axe. All I did was make fun of his chicken.

Yusuke: Himizu-chan, you have no life.

Voice in the Sky: I know.

Yusuke: And this story has no point.

Voice in the Sky: No shit Sherlock. That's why I'm writing this, to get all my random thoughts out and keep from corrupting my other stories.

Yusuke: They're already corrupted.

(Yusuke is smashed with the big wooden rabbit from Monty Python and the Holy Grail)

Voice in the Sky: BAKA!

ED: Wow… she's almost as bad as us.

MS: Worse actually.

ED: Hush. She is not as bad.

Igor: MS is right.

ED: Shut up.

Igor: Why?

ED: Because you're our hunchback slave and you know too much so if you don't shut up, we'd have to kill you after we fired you because we can't risk you babbling our secrets to the public, especially our secret hideout.

MS: If it's so secret… why do we have a giant sign on our roof saying 'Hideout of an Evil Doctor and a Mad Scientist'?

ED: Because we need more employees.

(MS and Igor fall over)

Kurama: So… where are Ryouko and Saru?

Voice in the Sky: Gathering supplies.

Kurama: Why? Everything's gone.

Voice in the Sky: You don't know them like I do. They'll be back. Until then… you wanna witness torture?

Kurama?.?

Voice in the Sky: Let me rephrase that. You wanna witness Karasu being tortured?

Kurama: Okay!

Voice in the Sky: Excellent. Oh, and grab Yusuke would you? He's still under the lovely rabbit.

Kurama: -.-()

Hiei: Must remain calm, must not blow up field… Himizu-chan would kill me…must not blow up rabbits…

Pink Bunnies: Huggles, huggles, huggles!

Teletubies: Teletubies! Teletubies!

Karasu: (Twitching madly) Must escape… must warn the Queen of the Weasels that the lasagna will attack the fort of July 52nd 14989... Must bring reinforcements of cabbage and tuna fish…

Hiei: He's completely lost it.

(A flash of light appears and suddenly Kurama, Yusuke, and Himizu-chan appear. Yusuke and Kurama promptly see the Teletubies, the pink bunnies, the twitching and incoherently muttering Karasu, and the stoically calm Hiei. Good friends that they are, they immediately burst into hysterical laughter.)

Hiei: Hn… Bakas.

Karasu: And then we must invade the lovely South Australian country of Mexico and liberate the hyenas from the clutches of the bananas and the squash.

Himizu-chan: (Looks at Karasu) How long has he been like this?

Hiei: Since about fifteen minutes after you left.

Himizu-chan: YAY! (Pokes Karasu with a stick) My experiment was a success. This torture chamber is fun.

Hiei: You're sick.

Himizu-chan: I am not. I'm deranged.

Hiei: Like there's a difference.

Himizu-chan: Actually there is. Now hush.

* * *

A/N: Yeah... short and pointless, just the way we like them. Now I have to go update my other ficcys before people come after me... O.o Read and Review! Ja ne! 


	9. Risu Squirrely Chan

Himizu-chan: Back again! This is a pretty good chapter, I think. I hope... Oh well... This is also the only chapter you'll get for over a week cuz I'm gonna be at a forensics camp with Ryouko for a week, leaving on Sunday. A whole week away from the computer... O.o HOW WILL I LIVE! Anywho... TOMORROW IS THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL! YAY! Okay, calming down now... Reveiw Responses!

Kato Shingetsu: Don't worry, I won't put you guys in the field. I only do that to people who... annoy me... (Eyes turn red, looks really demonic) (Goes back to normal) So no worries there. I'm scaring you? Woohoo! (Dances) I'm happy now. I love freaking people out. It's almost as fun as making them laugh.

Any Mew Moonlight: Ha ha ha! I liked that review. That made me laugh... not quite as much as you were laughing, but the laughter was there. Gald you liked that chapter, hope you like this one too.

Mega-Doomer: O.O Teletubbies are evil of course, why do you think they were in my field? You would dare join forces with the Cosmic Sheep! Damnit, why does everybody join forces with them! Saru joined forces with them a few months ago and is helping to plot my untimely demise... BUT I SHALL PREVAIL FOR I RULE ALL! Sorry, random moment. If ya want candy, ya gots ta earn it. Send me some information about yourself, I shall put you in my story, and you shall get candy. But no work, no candy.

Evilish Midgit-chan: Numa numa rules! I will gladly put you in my fanfic, but you need to send me some information about yourself first. Then you can hurt Karasu all you want. (Evil smile) (Karasu: You're mean! Me: I know. I try.) Boobah? No se que es, but you're the second person who's told me about them... I'm gettin creeped out...

Sami Kurama's Stalker: Numa numa is from Romania. The Internet is a wonderful well of information. I like that laugh. Poor Kurama... so many stalkers...

Well, that's that. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

* * *

MS: All right, ED, where are your brilliant ideas now? With Himizu-chan with them, we won't be able to snatch them up.

ED: Don't worry, MS. I've taken care of everything…

(Sounds of screaming are heard)

MS and Igor: O.O

ED: And that sounds like my little 'arrangement' coming right now…

MS and Igor: O.O;

ED: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

(A band of armadillos come running in, carrying a screaming Kuwabara)

MS and Igor: O.O()()() (Fall over)

ED: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Armadillos: Mwa ha ha ha ha! We have captured the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Mwa ha ha ha ha!

ED: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! (Passes out from lack of oxygen as a result of maniacal laughter)

Kuwabara: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! HELP! HELP ME! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HELP!

Armadillos: Mwa ha ha ha ha! We have captured the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Mwa ha ha ha ha! We have captured the baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Mwa ha ha ha ha!

Igor: This will never work…

Himizu-chan: I'm bored now… Ok Hiei, I'll take you back to the real world… But Karasu is staying here.

Hiei: Whatever…

Karasu: NO! Don't leave me here at the mercy of the apples, carrots, and monkeys!

Himizu-chan: You don't know any monkeys, and if you did, they would probably kill you because Saru is a monkey and they take orders from her.

(They leave Karasu alone)

Karasu: NO! Come and save me before the clay men and their green weasel minions kill me!

ED: Come here and look at this, MS… Is this not brilliant?

MS: That's one of the mind probes I made for our take-over-the-world plan… So what?

ED: Notice that this innocent little squirrel is carrying it. Himizu-chan loves squirrels, so this one has been specially trained to place this mind probe on her head. Then we can pick her brain.

MS: But the machines haven't been tested! We don't know what could happen!

ED: Oh well… If it fails, we still have… _him_…

(Kuwabara is chained up and armadillos are crawling on him and poking him with sticks)

Kuwabara: HELP ME! I WANT MY MOMMY! AAAAAAAHHH!

Igor: (Rocking back and forth with his head in his hands) No good can come from this, no good can come from this, no good can come from this, no good can come from this…

Himizu-chan: Well, here we are, back in Vegas… You know, I've been cruising this city for three Makai-damned days and I still haven't seen Greg Sanders from C.S.I.! If I don't get to see him soon, I'll probably have to hurt something…

Kurama: o.o;;; Um, thank you for bringing us back to the real world, Himizu-chan…

Hiei: Hn…

Yusuke: This world sucks. Vegas sucks. I'm not old enough to go to casinos!

Himizu-chan: Yusuke no baka! (Whacks him on the head three times)

Yusuke: OW! Why'd you do that!

Himizu-chan: One was from me, the other two were from Ryouko and Saru since they would have done that too if they'd been here… OHMYGOD! OHMYGOD! OHMYGOD! OHMYGOD!

Yusuke: (Slaps Himizu-chan) What is your deal!

Himizu-chan: OHMYGOD! SQUIRRELY-CHAN! (Runs over to a cute innocent-looking squirrel)

Yusuke: O.O;;; Squirrely-chan?

Kurama: O.O;;; Himizu-chan? Are you feeling okay?

Himizu-chan: It's a squirrely-chan! Isn't it cute! It's the sweetest little squirrely-chan I've ever seen! I'm going to call it Risu Squirrely-chan! (Hugs squirrel)

Squirrel: Squeak! (Yes, bakas, this is the squirrel sent by ED) Squeak squeakers!

Himizu-chan: No, silly Risu Squirrely-chan, you are not!

Kurama: O.O;;; You speak squirrel…?

Himizu-chan: No da.

Hiei: Hn… Just like Ryouko speaks dragon?

Himizu-chan: Yep! (Turns to Risu Squirrely-chan) You will not be probing my brain and sending my evil thoughts to be used by an evil doctor and a mad scientist, you silly squirrely-chan. You couldn't do that if you tried.

Squirrel: Squeakity squeak!

Himizu-chan: No you couldn't. You don't even know any evil doctors or mad scientists.

Squirrel: Squeaky squeak squeakers!

Himizu-chan: Armadillos did not capture Kuwabara! (Remembers they did) Um… yeah… How did you know?

Squirrel: -.- Squeakins.

Himizu-chan: I AM NOT BAKA! Bad Risu Squirrely-chan! How dare you say such things!

Hiei: Smart squirrel…

Himizu-chan: Shut up! (Hits Hiei)

Squirrel: (Sees chance) SQUEAKY! (Slaps mind probe onto Himizu and runs off cackling… if you've never seen a squirrel cackle, believe me, you don't want to… it's scary!)

Himizu: RISU SQUIRRELY-CHAN! COME BACK! (She starts to run after squirrel, but suddenly freezes in place. Her eyes roll back in her head and she is completely immobile)

Kurama: Himizu-chan? (Waves hand in front of her face)

Himizu-chan: (Twitches violently and falls onto the ground)

Yusuke: That's not normal… even for her…

Hiei: Nothing is normal for her.

Yusuke: Acting like a freak, a hyperactive child, and an annoying baka are normal behaviors.

Hiei: …

Yusuke: I WIN! HA HA HA HA HA!

Kurama: (Death glare) Will you shut up? I'm trying to revive her!

Yusuke: Meep… (Is silent)

Hiei: … (Is also silent, but that's normal)

MS: Fun, fun, fun… (Happily flipping through the contents of Himizu-chan's mind) Wow! This child needs a psychiatrist! Badly!

ED: Who cares? You've taken over her mind, right?

MS: I… Oh shit…

ED: I don't like the sound of that.

MS: She's using her author powers to fight me… I'm losing control… OH NO!

ED: What's happening now? (Pissed off)

MS: She broke the connection… But that's not the worst part…

ED: -.- Must you always be so dramatic? Just tell me already! Christ…

MS: You're ruining the tension… Fine! She's broken loose from me, but in doing so, she is unleashing the contents of her mind on the world! And she's still unconscious, so she can't even control that!

ED: How is that bad?

MS: You don't get it, do you? A physical manifestation of the contents of her mind would wreck untold havoc and probably destroy the entire world. Some of the things don't bear thinking about and only a psycho could have thought of them! The apocalypse is here now! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

ED: … (Slaps MS) PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER MAN! PANICKING IS MY JOB AROUND HERE! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!

Igor: I knew nothing good would come from this, I just knew it, but does anyone listen to me, of course not, I'm just the unimportant hunchback servant, my opinions don't count in any way, I always have the right ideas, but nobody listens, nobody cares, I should have been a college professor, Mom always said that I should be a college professor, but I wouldn't listen to her, I should have listened to her, she was right, just like she always was, why didn't I listen to her… (Continues muttering to himself while ED and MS run around screaming and panicking like the freaks that they are.)

* * *

Oh no! The products of Himizu-chan's mind areabout to run loose! Mind you, they're pretty scary... Anywho, Read and Review! Ja ne! 


	10. Contents of a Mind Unleashed

A/N: Phew, I'm here. I made my deadline. I'm leaving again tomorrow. So I can't update for a while again. Now, review responses.

**Kato Shingetsu**: Ouch. Getting sunburnt is bad. But beach is fun! Why would I hurt my reviewers, unless they were seriously pissing me off, which you guys are not.

**Sami Kurama's Stalker**: Well, what do I know. I have a friend who has a really evil laugh... he sounds like... like... like... I dunno... Yeah, it was quick, but you can't expect that from meall the time. -.-()

**Mega-Doomer**: You're finally in the story here! This should be fun...Give me some ideas, what do you want to do? Who do you like to torture? Stuff like that.

**Evilish Midget-chan**: You're in the story now too! I thought it would be fun to have two reviewers in here instead of one. Tell me what you think and give me some ideas on what I should make you do. Eventually you'll get to torture Karasu. Yes, he will hate cheese.

**wonderingprophet**: Nothing wrong with talking like Yoda. Talking like Yoda I do not do well, but talk like Yoda I try to do. Very badly I do. Of course Las Vegas is doomed! The world is doomed! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Thanks for the reviews guys! Enjoy the chapter!

* * *

Kurama: (Still trying to revive Himizu-chan, but making no progress) Come on, what's the matter with you?

Hiei: At least when she's unconscious, her mouth isn't running.

Yusuke: Got that right.

(Himizu-chan suddenly twitches violently)

Kurama: What in the world?

(A rumbling sound begins to echo in the distance)

Yusuke, Hiei, and Kurama?.?

(A herd of purple buffalo kicking soccer balls and waving crosses comes running by)

Buffalo: Purple grass fairy crusading buffalo! Purple grass fairy crusading buffalo!

Yusuke, Hiei, and Kurama: O.O (Face-fault)

Buffalo: Purple grass fairy crusading buffalo! Purple grass fairy crusading buffalo!

Yusuke: Wait… didn't Himizu-chan say something about those once?

Hiei: I don't know. She talks so much nonsense, I've lost track.

Kurama: You don't think… The mind probe…

(A band of elves come running out of nowhere drinking Mountain Dew and getting really really high)

Elves: SugarsugarsugarsodasodasugarsweetstuffCAFFEINE!

(A gang of gremlins comes running out of nowhere hurling rocks at the elves)

Gremlins: Die you little freaks! Give us supreme control or you'll be punished with all the tortures of broccoli and spinach!

Elves: We colonized her mind first; we will never give up the power!

Kurama: Didn't Himizu-chan swear to us that her mind had been taken over by elves?

Yusuke: And that they were having a war with gremlins?

Hiei: You guys actually pay attention to her when she goes off on one of her irrelevant tangents?

(Elves and gremlins begin hurling rocks and fireballs and cows at each other)

Gremlins: SURRENDER PANSIES!

Elves: NEVER!

(Chibi Kenshin's come wandering up and are repeatedly hit on the heads with rocks and fireballs and cows)

Chibi Kenshin's: (With swirly eyes) Oro, oro, oro, oro…

(Green cows come running up)

Green Cows: MOO! MOO!

(Purple puppies start chasing the green cows)

Purple Puppies: Woof woof!

Purple Puppy 1: (Runs up to Kurama) Hello mister. Would you like to buy a bomb?

Purple Puppy 2: (Also runs up to Kurama) Or maybe a lovely machine gun?

Purple Puppy 3: (Joins the other 2) Or one of those lovely weapons of mass destruction from Iraq that aren't supposed to exist? We took them, you see. That's why no one ever found them.

Kurama: O.O;;;

Purple Puppy 4: Yes, we stole these from the Iraqis and tanks from the Russians and biological weapons from the Americans and we're using them to arm terrorists who will blow up Cuban drug traffickers and people who sell children as sex slaves!

Hiei: -.- I always knew that child had issues.

Purple Puppy 5: Well, if you don't want any of these, would you like some banana milk from those green cows?

Yusuke: O.o Those cows produce banana milk?

Purple Puppy 5: Well, yeah, what do you want them to produce? Coconut milk?

Yusuke: ………………………………………………… (Falls over)

Kurama: Um… thank you very much… but I don't think we require your services today…

Purple Puppies: Okay! See you later! (Run off after the green cows)

(Big yellow furry thing approaches eating a tub of Jell-O)

Hiei: And what are you supposed to be?

Big Yellow Furry Thing: I'm a Purple People Eater!

Kurama: But you're not purple and you're not eating people.

Purple People Eater: Nope, I'm yellow and all I eat is Jell-O!

Yusuke: Then, why…? (Too confused to finish question)

Purple People Eater: I dunno… ask her, she created me. (Points to Himizu-chan) See you later. (Walks off)

Kurama, Yusuke, and Hiei: O.O (Stare in horror at Himizu-chan)

Yusuke: Holy hell…

Kurama: It's true… the mind probe… everything in her brain has become reality…

Hiei: The world is doomed. I'm going back to Makai. (Starts to leave, but crashes into a random brick wall that has appeared out of nowhere) WTF?

Yusuke: Her brain makes random walls?

Kurama: It's Himizu-chan we're talking about here… I'm sure anything is possible as long as it's not rational.

(Anvil falls on Kurama's head)

Kurama: What the frick?

Yusuke and Hiei: -.-()

Kurama: Obviously she still has her author powers in her mind…

Yusuke: Well, what do we do?

Hiei: What can we do?

Kurama: Perhaps if we get the probe loose, she can make everything back to normal?

Hiei: You're talking about Himizu-chan… would she really want to?

Kurama: -.-() Probably not…

ED: IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

(Outside, snow is falling even though it's 90 degrees)

Kuwabara: Get these armadillos away from me!

Armadillos: Kill the baka! Kill the baka! Kill the baka! Doom on him! Doom on him! Doom on him!

Igor: Why don't you reverse the properties of the mind probe so everything gets sucked back into her mind?

MS: You shut up! You're just an ignorant hunchback servant who doesn't know anything! What if I reversed the properties of the mind probe so everything gets sucked back into her mind?

ED: Brilliant MS brilliant!

Igor: …

Yusuke: The insanity is too much for me!

: Insanity you say! You ain't seen nothing yet!

(Two girls jump out of nowhere)

Random Girl 1: Hi, I'm Super Mintie Mouse! I like sugar! I also like torturing people! We're gonna have fun!

Random Girl 2: And I'm Evilish Midget-chan! I have caffinated mints, which I am now high on!

Super Mintie Mouse: Mints! Mintie! Super Mintie Mouse! Yay!

Evilish Midget-chan: I'M NOT DONE YET! (Smacks Super Mintie Mouse) I worship cheese and I love Hiei!

Hiei: O.O (Backs away slowly) Oh no… you must be… one of… THEM! NOOOO!

Evilish Midget-chan: HIEI! (Glomps Hiei)

Hiei: God no…

* * *

What purpose do these two girls have in the story? Can they help bring Himizu around? You'll find out when I update... After I decide the answers to these questions. No, I have no clue what I'm writing. So we'll see what happens. Read and Review! Ja ne! 


	11. The Awakening

A/N: It's been a long time, hasn't it? I'm really really sorry! I just haven't been able to think of anything, so I've decided that I'm going to end it soon. -- See. Soon. Not now. Not his chapter. But be warned. I will end it soon. I'd love to continue it because it's so popular, but I just can't write it much longer. I'll finish it becuase I've promised myself that I will never have an unfinished fic on my page, so hopefully that's a point in my favor. I'm really sorry I've made you guys wait so long, I know I hate it when my favorite authors don't post for a long time, I hope these last few chapters make up for my long silence. Thanks for sticking with me, those of you that I have left.

By now, I'm sure you all know about ridiculous new rule about not responding to reviews, but remember, this doesn't make me apreciate your reviews any less. Yeah, the world is ending, I'm glad so many of you are entertained by this, that's what I'm here for, and you guys are awesome! Okay, enough of that.Enjoy the chapter.

* * *

Yusuke: Okay, who the hell are you two?

Super Mintie Mouse: (Ignoring him, talking to Evilish Midget-chan) Didn't we go over this already?

Evilish Midget-chan: I think so… Ooooh, look purple puppies! (Runs off)

Super Mintie Mouse: I think so too. We already answered this. You're annoying me. (Puts pink apron on Yusuke)

Yusuke: Ack! X.X (Gags and dies)

Kurama: I think what he was trying to say is, who are you in relation to Himizu?

Super Mintie Mouse: Oh, we're reviewers. We asked to be in the story and she said sure, so we're here to annoy the crap out of you guys and maybe do something semi-important to get candy.

Kurama: Okay then… O.o

Hiei: This is screwed up… Why the hell is it snowing! It's 90 degrees, damnit!

(Snow turns orange and starts accumulating in his hair)

Hiei: Grr… that stupid girl…

Kurama: This isn't normal…

Evilish Midget-chan: (Yelling at purple puppies) BUT I WANT CHEESE! I HAVE MY OWN WEAPONS!

Super Mintie Mouse: Sweet! (Runs to the puppies) You're selling weapons? (Buys all the weapons she can carry and proceeds to blow up Vegas)

(A pink tornado shaped like a dragonfly appeared)

Kurama: How can a tornado be shaped like a dragonfly and still be a tornado?

Hiei: Don't ask questions. You're annoying me and killing your brain cells as you try to figure it out.

Himizu-chan: THE COSMIC SHEEP HAVE FOUND ME AND THEY'RE GOING TO GIVE ME THE TORTURE OF GREEN TURNIPS AND SAUERKRAUT!

Kurama: Ack!

Hiei: Give us a heart attack why don't you!

Yusuke: What's going on?

Kurama: She's awake…

Himizu-chan: You betcha! Where's that squirrel? I need to teach her some manners!

Kurama: Uh…

Himizu-chan: Ooh, look at that tornado! That's just like the one that's been blowing around in my mind. And look at the snow! Woohoo! Oh my gosh! It's the purple grass fairy crusading buffalo! (Runs off towards them)

Kurama: Oh my God…

Hiei: Why us?

Evilish Midget-chan: Hey! Look! Cosmic Sheep! All sporks rally to me! We must defeat out hated enemies, the Cosmic Sheep! (Runs off, followed by an army of sporks)

Hiei: Well, it could be worse…

(A pink apron is thrown over his head)

Super Mintie Mouse: FEEL THE WRATH OF THE PINK!

Hiei: GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF! IT BURNS!

Kurama: (Snickers)

Himizu-chan: (Comes flying out of nowhere, tackles Kurama, and starts strangling him) YOU'VE GOTTA HIDE ME! QUICK, BEFORE THEY FIND ME! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THEY WERE HERE?

Kurama: What are you talking about?

Himizu-chan: THE GREMLINS! AND THE ELVES! YOU GOTTA HIDE ME!

Kurama: Himizu-chan, they live in your head. You should be used to them by now.

Himizu-chan: When they're in my head, I can at least try to ignore them! I can't do that here! The elves are being all psychopathic and murderous and crazy!

Kurama: YOU are psychopathic and murderous and crazy.

Himizu-chan: And the gremlins are even worse! They're spastic and insane and twisted and cruel and sadistic and…

Kurama: YOU are spastic and insane and twisted and cruel and sadistic!

Himizu-chan: BUT I'M NOT HENTAI!

Kurama: Come again?

Himizu-chan: The gremlins are hentai! They project evil images into my mind! They're a plague and a disease and a curse!

Kurama: I'll admit that you're not hentai, but you do have your moments.

Himizu-chan: THAT'S THE PROBLEM! IT'S NOT ME! IT'S THE GREMLINS! AND NOW THAT THEY HAVE BEEN PHYSICALLY MANIFESTED, THEY ARE GOING TO TORTURE ME WITH MORE HENTAINESS AND I'M GOING TO GO INSANE AND GO ON A MURDEROUS RAMPAGE AND THERE WILL BE NO ONE LEFT ON THE PLANET BUT A FEW LUCKY SOULS THAT I SPARE AND MAYBE SOME SUNFLOWERS!

Kurama: (Has shrunk to a chibi size from the force and volume of her yelling) Eep… Don't yell.

Himizu-chan: Right… sorry… Let's get the rest of the crew and get out of here. Where are they?

Kurama: Just look…

Himizu-chan: Oh crap…

(Shot of Yusuke joining Evilish Midget-chan in the brutal murder of all Cosmic Sheep and Hiei running from Super Mintie Mouse and her deadly pink apron of doom.)

Himizu-chan: Hey Kurama?

Kurama: What?

Himizu-chan: Do you know where I can get a mass mind wipe for the entire planet?

Kurama: Ordinarily I'd say Koenma, but I don't think he'll be too happy with you after he sees this…

Himizu-chan: (Not listening any more) What's this? (Pulls mind probe off her head)

(And before you go yelling at me about how someone should have done this earlier, it's really small and it was hidden under her hair. And if there's one thing you don't do to Himizu-chan, it's touch her hair. Because she is my counterpart and I can't stand it when people touch my hair because of bad experiences with my little cousin trying to yank it out when I was younger.)

(All crazy things from Himizu-chan's mind vanish)

Himizu-chan: Holy son of a sick monkey's uncle! (Yes I really do say that. -.-()) That was freaking sweet! But the Cosmic Sheep are still here.

Cosmic Sheep 1: Look! It's the girl! Get her!

Himizu-chan: (Brandishing pitchfork) BACK! BACK YOU WOOLEN SWEATERS FROM THE SEVEN HELLS OF HADES!

Kurama: Himizu-chan, people are staring…

Himizu-chan: You should expect that if you hang around with me. I get that a lot. Besides, if you saw a bunch of neon-green sheep attacking a girl, you'd stare too.

Kurama: Especially if that girl was brandishing a pitchfork and screaming insults at the sheep instead of running for her life like any normal girl would.

Himizu-chan: NEVER BE NORMAL!

Evilish Midget-chan: Cool! Evil bloodthirsty sheep!

(Death glare from Himizu-chan)

Evilish Midget-chan: Er… I mean… Oh no! Evil bloodthirsty sheep!

Super Mintie Mouse: I'm tired of torturing Hiei. Now I'm gonna torture Kurama.

Kurama: Yikes! (Runs off)

Super Mintie Mouse: YAY! (Chases Kurama)

Himizu-chan: Where's Yusuke?

Evilish Midget-chan: Er… -.-()

Armadillos: Catch the second baka, catch the second baka, catch the second baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him! Catch the second baka, catch the second baka, catch the second baka! Doom on him, doom on him, doom on him!

Yusuke: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HELP!

Hiei: Oh good, he can find the other baka for us.

Himizu-chan: Well, I'm sure he can take care of himself, so… let's go torture Karasu!

Kurama: You're psycho, you know that?

Himizu-chan: And proud of it!

Kurama: Right… -.-()

* * *

Hope you guys are happy with this chapter. Once again, I'm sorry about the long silence, and I swear you'll never have to wait this long ever again! On my oath as an authoress! Read and Review! Ja ne! 


	12. The Calvary Arrives?

A/N: Heh... short chapter. But I'm gonna get flamed so bad for this, so I decided that I'd make the last bit two chapter instead of one... So I'll finish my lovely ending sometime soon, hopefully before Thanksgiving... and then this fic will be done! Alleluia! This fic annoys me so much, sometimes I just wanna strangle it and make it vanish from all existence! But I will finish it becuase I promised myself when I created this profile that I would never leave a fic unfinished and I'm going to keep that promise. So flame me now becuase I know you're going to, but be kind in the last chapter, I beg you. I want to leave on a happy note. I'll try to update soon! Please try to enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Evilish Midget-chan or Super Mintie Mouse or Hannibal Lecter or YYH characters. But I do own whatever insanity or sanity is in my mind... mostly insanity.

(In the land of torture)

Himizu: Well, here we are. Evilish, Mintie, do your stuff!

Super Mintie Mouse and Evilish Midget-chan: YAY!

(Super Mintie Mouse covers Karasu with her evil pink apron of doom and Evilish Midget-chan hands Karasu a piece of cheese… o.O)

Karasu: AAAAAHHHHHHH! GET IT OFF! (Claws wildly at the apron and ends up throwing the cheese onto the ground)

Evilish Midget-chan: O.O NOOO! YOU DROPPED THE CHEESE ON THE GROUND! I HATE YOU! INU-CHAN!

(A giant dog jumps out of nowhere)

Evilish Midget-chan: HE DROPPED THE CHEESE! SIC 'EM INU-CHAN!

(Inu-chan makes attempts to tear Karasu's throat out)

Himizu: Hey! Hey! Knock it off! Don't kill him!

Kurama and Hiei: O.O (Anime fall)

Kurama: Did I just hear Himizu-chan defending Karasu?

Hiei: Either that or we're both hallucinating…

Himizu: It's not for him; it's for me! First of all, Koenma will bitch at me forever about letting my totally psycho and totally awesome reviewers murder Karasu, then he'll force me to use MY authoress powers to bring that stupid crow back to life! My authoress powers are just too important to waste on some dumb vampire! And that's not even counting the fact that Karasu, hard as this is for me to believe, really does have fans who would kill me for killing him. Plus there are the freaky psycho people out there that go ballistic if you even talk about killing someone and I have to try very hard not to smack them upside the head. So Evilish, you have to stop. I'm sorry. I know how much fun it would be, but for the sake of my sanity, you'll have to stop.

Evilish Midget-chan: Fine… (Pouts, but sends Inu-chan back to wherever he came from) Can I torture him with something else?

Himizu: Be my freaking guest; just don't kill him! (Conjures up a comfy chair and a Mountain Dew and settles down to watch Karasu be tortured with sporks)

Kurama: Now, what were you just saying about your authoress powers being so important?

Himizu: This is very important. My comfort is essential.

Kurama: …

Himizu: I notice that you have no retort. My logic is too much for you, isn't it?

Hiei: What logic?

Himizu: (Death glare) Shut up, shrimp!

(Several hours later, after watching Karasu be tortured for a very long time by Evilish Midget-chan and Super Mintie Mouse…)

Himizu: (Sigh) As amusing as this is, I think you guys are going to have to leave now.

Evilish Midget-chan and Super Mintie Mouse: Do we have to?

Himizu: Yeah, you do… But hopefully this will make up for it. (Gives each girl a Bag of Magical Unlimited Candies) Because of course we all know that that's the only reason you guys even wanted to come into this crazy messed-up thing that I'm actually calling a fanfic. Ok, see ya'll later! Keep those reviews coming you two!

Evilish Midget-chan and Super Mintie Mouse: BYE! Thanks for the candy!

(Evilish Midget-chan and Super Mintie Mouse vanish)

Hiei: Can we leave yet?

Himizu: What's the matter? Does this place scare you?

Hiei: Not really…

Himizu: Then you are seriously touched in the head, boy! Everyone with at least a little bit of rationality fears the evil torture place of doom! Even some of my reviewers fear it! You should fear it too! And fear me! For I worship Hannibal Lecter and the Holy Duck! Hurrah for cannibalistic psychopaths and poppy-growing waterfowl! (Strikes dramatic pose as lightning flashes. Then everything goes back to normal) So, are you scared yet?

Hiei: … Not really… o.O (Twitches a little bit)

Himizu: Argh… You're retarded. What does Ryouko see it you anyways?

Ryouko: I heard that, freak!

Himizu: o.o Um… no you didn't…

Saru: What are we talking about?

Kurama: Oh boy… triple the insanity…

(Ryouko is now screaming at Himizu for calling Hiei retarded and suggesting that she is in love with him)

Saru: So, fox, what's our mission?

(Himizu is now yelling at Ryouko about being a spying little moron who does love Hiei and needs to stop denying it)

Kurama: As far as I can tell, Himizu wants your help finding Yusuke and Kuwabara and then getting this fic back to a fair degree of reality.

(Hiei is looking terrified of the two psycho screaming girls)

Saru: Whose reality? A normal person's? Or Himizu's?

(Ryouko is now calling Himizu an idiot because she's a hockey nut and in love with a hockey player that she has maybe .0000000000000000000000000000000000000001 chance of dating)

Kurama: -.-() Yeah, there is a big difference, isn't there?

(Himizu is now very pissed about Ryouko's last comment)

Himizu: Well, at least I actually have a chance of meeting and dating the guy I'm in love with! You can only interact with Hiei in fanfictions! Hate to break it to you, but he's a freaking animated character! He is not real! Your chances of dating him are ZERO!

Ryouko: Who the hell said I wanted to date him?

Himizu: Don't deny it! You're madly in love with him!

Ryouko: You're on crack! That's why you actually think Nick Rash is hot!

Himizu: HOW DARE YOU CALL HIM UGLY! AND HIS NAME IS RICK! STOP CALLING HIM THAT EVIL NICKNAME!

(Ryouko and Himizu start strangling each other)

Kurama: And this all could have been avoided…

Saru: But it's very entertaining.

Kurama: -.-() And we all know that's the important thing, right?

Saru: (Slaps Kurama on the back) You're catching on.

Kurama: Right… -.-()()()

Hiei: Hn…

A/N: Read and Review, Read and Flame, I really don't care, just make sure you hit that nice purple button in the bottom left-hand corner of your screen! And don't be too mean, please.


	13. Purple Monkeys?

A/N: IT'S DONE! THIS FIC IS DONE! (Dances) OMG, I am so happy! I hated this fic. But it's finished and I can get on with my life! I'm glad that everyone seems to have liked it, because I truly hated it, it was actually becoming a chore to write. If a fic becomes a chore to write, that's not good. But it's done and I don't have to worry about it anymore.

This last chapter is really really weird. I'm currently high on two cans of Mountain Dew and two giant Pixy Stix, so I'm kinda hyper. I think those things are drugged because I've been having weird visions since I ate all that. Really weird stuff too, something about me being kidnapped and tortured by some masochist while some really hot guy on Criminal Minds is forced to watch... I can't come up with stuff like that on my own! I think those sticks were drugged, I really do! But anyways, this is the end! Hope you like it!

Disclaimer: I own everything in this fic except Yu Yu Hakusho and Las Vegas and C.S.I.

* * *

Himizu: All right, let's go back to the real world!

Ryouko: Right… the one you destroyed…

Himizu: I NEVER! IT WAS THOSE DAMN SHEEP!

Ryouko: Right… there was no malicious aforethought about this.

Himizu: I don't even control those woolen sweaters from hell! They're mutant! They're evil! They're trying to kill me!

Saru: Wow… that sounded like Hiei…

Himizu: Wha--- Hey, she's right! That's awesome!

Hiei: -.-#

Himizu: Look at him! He's trying to kill me! He's evil! And he's a mutant! (Anime peace sign)

Hiei: Mutant? -.-#

Himizu: Yeps.

Hiei: (Growling) Are you sure?

Himizu: Yeps. (Grinning)

Kurama: Er… Himizu-chan…

Himizu: What?

(Kurama has no time to say anything else, because Hiei suddenly runs his katana through Himizu and cuts her in half)

Saru: SHE'S DEAD! WE'RE FREE!

Ryouko: Praise the Lord! (Dances)

(Himizu's body suddenly turns into a log that has been cut in half by a katana)

Everyone: O.O Wtf?

Himizu: Yo! Over here peeps!

Ryouko: I'm pretty sure that violated some sort of copyright.

Himizu: Meh meh meh. Phooey on you. In case, you're wondering, that was Kawarimi no Jutsu, which I stole from Naruto. Very handy.

Kurama: What's that? Who's Naruto?

Himizu: Ugh… you need to read more manga. I'll give you a really good website later. Naruto is some ninja dude in some anime and they use these attacks called jutsus and I stole the one that enables you to replace your body with something else so the attacker hits that instead… of course, I can't really perform jutsus, my authoress powers are doing that for me…But all hail Wikipedia because they have a list of EVERY SINGLE Naruto jutsu that they ever use! But anyways, we were going back to the real world!

Karasu: Can I come too, please? (Puppy eyes)

Himizu: Oh shit, you're still here aren't you?

Karasu: Unfortunately.

Himizu: How in the hell did you get here anyways? I'm the only one besides Koenma who has the power to summon you from the depths of hell and I blackmailed Koenma already, so really it's only me and I definitely didn't summon you, so who did? By the way, don't even ask me what I blackmailed Koenma with. You don't deserve to know. So who summoned you?

Karasu: If you must know, it was some creepy evil doctor and an even freakier mad scientist. Are they friends of yours?

Himizu: (Totally blank face) Um, I don't recall letting any evil doctors or mad scientists loose in this country… try Bosnia, I let a couple loose over there about five years ago…

Everyone Else: Baka… Totally annoyed by Himizu's idiocy)

Himizu: Oh crap! You mean that THEY'RE the ones that have been messing up this fic?

Everyone Else: (Nod nod nod)

Himizu: Crap. I really better learn to keep track of those damn computer glitches that infect my computer and add freaky people. Ok, Karasu, back to hell!

Karasu: Thank God, I can leave you freaky people!

(Himizu sends Karasu back to hell)

Himizu: NOW, BACK… TO THE FUTURE! (Dramatic pose)

Kurama and Hiei: -.-()

Ryouko and Saru: (Sigh) Hopeless…

Himizu: Sorry. Random moment. Back to the real world! More specifically, back the hideout of the evil doctor and mad scientist.

* * *

At the hideout

Himizu: Okay, let me do the talking… HEY, FREAY PEOPLE WHO ENTERED THIS FIC WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! I HAVE A BONE TO PICK WITH YOU, YOU FREAKS!

Kurama: So much for stealth…

Igor: May I tell my masters who is calling?

Himizu: I definitely do not have time for this. MOVE IT BUSTER!

Hiei: I thought we had all the time in the world…

Ryouko: Don't say anything. This is really funny.

Igor: Yes ma'am! Please don't hurt me! I'm just the innocent little hunchback servant!

Himizu: Sure, whatever.

Igor: Masters, there are some people here to see you…

ED: Oh good, maybe they're applying for jobs here!

Himizu: Yeah, we are. Jobs to kick your asses out of this fic!

MS: Shit. It's her.

Himizu: You were expecting maybe Abraham Lincoln?

Saru: Oh boy…

Kuwabara: KURAMA! HIEI! YOU CAME TO SAVE US!

Yusuke: But did you have to bring those three psychos along?

Armadillos: SILENCE, MORTALS! SUFFER! DOOM ON YOU!

Himizu: o.O Wow… I though I was psycho. Anyways… back to business. Who are you guys and what are you doing in this fic?

ED: We are an evil doctor and mad scientist bent on destroying your puny fanfictions and taking over the minds of these four boys and using them in our world domination plans!

Ryouko: There are so many flaws in that plan; it's not even funny.

MS: Like what?

Saru: First, we're taking over the world and we can kick your asses any day!

ED: Not with out weapons!

Ryouko: What, are you going to throw beanbags at us or something?

MS: SHE FIGURED OUT! She must have read our minds!

Girls: (Face fault)

Kurama and Hiei: Oh my God…

Yusuke: HEY! Remember me? The Spirit Detective? The star of our show? Ringing any bells? Hello?

Himizu: Kurama, Hiei, do you guys wanna chase away those armadillos?

Kurama: I would… but I'm kinda…

Hiei: Freaked out…

Himizu: Ugh. Wimps. Must I do everything myself? (Teleports the armadillos away)

Ryouko: Where'd you send them?

Himizu: That private hell place. They'll make a nice edition.

Saru: Sweet!

Himizu: Now, where were we? Oh yeah, about to kick butt!

ED: You'll never get rid of us!

MS: Yeah, what he said!

Himizu: Ryouko… weapon S421!

Ryouko: o.O WTF?

Saru: She means the cell phone.

Kurama, Hiei, Yusuke, and Kuwabara: O.O How's that gonna help?

Himizu: (Dials number) Hello? George? Hey man, how's it going? How's the toddler? Really? Crap. Oh well. Tell him it's me. I need a favor. Sure, I'll hold. Thanks dude. (Several seconds later) Hey Koenma. I need a favor. (Long silence) Yeah, I'll give you the tapes. (More silence) No, I don't have any copies. (Crosses fingers) Whatever. I'm the blackmailer around here, remember that! Now listen to me! I have an evil doctor and a mad scientist here. I need to get rid of them. Can you help me out here? (Silence) Yeah, I could beat the shit out of them, but that's unnecessary violence that my reviewers don't need to see.

Ryouko: Hypocrite!

Himizu: Shut up! Sorry, Koenma. Where were we? Oh, right. So, what are your thoughts? You'll do it! Thanks a million! Yeah, I'll give Botan the tapes next time I see her. Okay, bye. (Hangs up phone) Okay, Koenma said he'd take care of it and send them to eternal damnation, which he added was my eventual destination, but I've heard that before, so I don't care.

(ED and MS vanish)

Igor: I'M FREE! (Runs off throwing daisies and singing Shiny Happy People)

Himizu: Cool, we're done! And the moral of the story is, don't mess with purple monkeys!

Kurama: Where in all the insanity did you see any purple monkeys?

Himizu: Oh, you may not have seen them, but they were there, they're always watching, freaky CIA rejects…

Kurama: Right… -.-()

* * *

Epilogue

Eventually, Himizu, Ryouko, and Saru went back to their scary Authoress hangout where Saru played videogames and Ryouko and Himizu watched crime shows until their eyeballs fell out (which would take about ten years of nonstop watching without sleep, so it's not going to happen). Kurama, Hiei, Yusuke, and Kuwabara were eventually released from Las Vegas (which did eventually go back to normal so C.S.I. wouldn't be corrupted) and went back to that Voidspace where they waited for people to use them in fics. ED and MS were sentenced to eternal damnation, which they deserved. Igor became the owner of a company called Microsoft under the alias Bill Gates and drank all the Frappuccinos he wanted. Koenma continued to be blackmailed by Himizu. Karasu continued to be tortured in hell. And the purple monkeys continued to not exist except in Himizu's overactive and insane brain.

THE END! (Finally!)

It's over. It's done. Mwa ha ha. Now I can concentrate on my remaining TWO fics! Yay!


End file.
